Why Your Words Shape Your Heart

The importance of properly choosing one's words when you speak or even when you think When you think to self. That is the basis of speech. Speech is merely a physical way of articulating your thoughts to others. It's just a means of communication. But when a person speaks, even when a person thinks to himself, they must make sure to match what they say on the outside to what they feel on the inside and what they think. way a person speaks should be the way a person thinks. In the sense that for instance, if a person does not use profanity in his each and a person should not use profanity in his heart when he's thinking and so on and so forth. We learn from these chapters that words have meaning and they have effects. Words are very serious things. Words can have profound effects on listeners. And words can have a profound effect even on the one speaking himself. What does that mean? scholars have mentioned with regards to for instance, the statement of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala speaks about the hypocrites. And he describes them as individuals who are deaf, dumb, and blind. Deaf, they cannot hear, dumb, they cannot speak, blind, they cannot see. And what's meant by this is a spiritual sense. Ly of the heart, deafness of the heart, and dumbness of the heart Now, why are these three grouped together? Two of them are taking in and one is kind of going out. Two of them are input and one is output. The scholars have mentioned that these are the three main paths to the heart. The three main paths to the heart. What you hear, what you see, but also what you say. Because the way a person speaks, reflects what is in the heart, and when a person speaks, it reaffirms whatever it is that is in their heart. What does this mean? A person tells a lie the more they continue to tell this lie, the more they start to believe it themselves. a person and lie and even lie to himself if a person tells lies enough, they will start to believe their own lies. This is a very interesting phenomena. That if a person says something that is untruthful, they know it's untruthful but they continue to say it and double down on this lie. They will start to believe this lie themselves. An instance of this is the statement of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Where he says the Can we after run? He says subhanahu wa ta'ala.

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We will not go to the fire. We will not be punished in hell except for a few days. This is what they've told themselves. They have invented this belief that no matter what they do, essentially, they will only be punished in the fire for a while because they are the chosen people of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. So, they believe that, you know, we do all these bad things but anyways, even if we were to be punished, it will only be for a few days. Now, when they first came up with this, obviously, they understood that this was not true. But they continued to say it and doubled down on it until it became, until it became a belief of theirs, and Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala describes this belief and he says, we says and they were deceived in their religion they were deceived by the lies that they used to tell, by their own fabrications. So they fabricate a lie, they propagate it, and then they start to believe it themselves. This is one of the reasons, one of the reasons that lying is so terrible in Islam. And with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. So words have a huge effect. And a person should always choose his words carefully. Think about what he is about to say before he says it. Analyze it. And a person should always choose proper wordings. For instance, the prophet says, the narration of He says he says whoever believes in Allah in the last day, then this person should speak with that which is good or remain silent. So, we have only one option, only one kind of speech that we can speak with and that is that which is good in itself. Otherwise, we must remain quiet. We must remain silent. We are not allowed to speak unless we have something good to say. this means as Imam and Allah has eluded to that this is that a person must think about what he is going to say before he says it. and if he realizes that this is bad He should not say it. He's not allowed to say it. If he sees that this is neither good nor bad, then he should not say it. If he sees that he, if he is unsure whether this is good or bad, he is not allowed to speak. A person is only allowed to speak with that which he is certain of being good or to remain silent. Let's take a let's take a look and ponder the meaning here that a person must speak with that which is good or remain silent. Now, notice how the prophet worded this. He said, speak with that which is good. He didn't say speak with that which is true. That which is correct that which is good. because not every truth is necessarily appropriate to say. That is not the only condition of goodness that something be true or factual in itself. As a matter of fact, it may be a major sin for a person to say something that is true because it's inappropriate. Now, for example, what is backbiting? Backbiting, Aliba, is when a person says something true about another person that is disparaging, correct? That's truth. saying something that is factual. Yes, it is factual but is it is inappropriate So, it becomes a major sin to say it. Maybe something is true but inappropriate And perhaps something is not necessarily true but it is appropriate. A person must speak with that which is good or remain silent. And so, we have three things to look at when it comes to good, that which is good speech. Number one, we have to look at the thing itself that we're going to say. Is it in itself good? Meaning, it's honest, it's correct, it's truthful, it's accurate. The second thing we need to look at is, is it appropriate Meaning, where I say it or how I say it. Is it appropriate? Number three, what are the ramifications of this statement? Right? A person may say something that is true, that is correct, it's maybe unappropriate time to say it, an appropriate place to say it, but it's maybe, maybe disastrous person who says something that has a bad effect on people An example of this is is teaching are certain aspects of history or certain aspects of the Quran or Sunnah that are not appropriate for the listener. because not all knowledge is appropriate for all people at all times. Does that make sense? Not all knowledge is appropriate for all people at all times. It may even be a narration A a word that was a statement of the prophet but the listener is not prepared for for that that narration. They are not of a certain level of knowledge to be able to understand and implement the narration properly. An example of this is that was with the prophet and the prophet said, the.

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Any partners unto him and the right of the servants upon Allah is that he will not punish them if they do so. Said, should I not inform people of this? Should I not announce this great news to the people? He said, do not tell them, lest they become laxadaisical in their worship of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. They misunderstand these words. They start to that, well, I worship Allah. I don't associate any partners unto him. Therefore, I don't have to work as hard in doing good deeds. Now, what happens instead of this making their worship intensify, it actually because of their level of knowledge, it will, cause their good deeds to lessen and cause regress in their worship of Allah. So, not all knowledge is appropriate for all people Who said Speak to people on their level with that which they can understand and relate to. So a person a scholar who is well versed in the Quran and in the is a skilled doctor. He knows how to prescribe this medicine. He knows which narrations are appropriate for which listeners. He knows what aspects of knowledge are appropriate for the listener. It's not he's just opens up the pharmacy and starts giving out all the you know, all the medications to everyone. Certain medications might kill people. Certain medications might harm people right? So, this is a very important aspect of the way that we speak. We have to be very careful with the words that we choose and things that we say and how we say them. to the point that we are to take such care with the way that we speak so as not to even momentarily give the listener the wrong image. so as to not even momentarily give the listener the wrong image momentarily. What does that mean? For instance, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala puts his words in a particular order so that when a person is thinking and imagining in his mind's eye what Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is saying no image will come through a person's mind that is unintended. not even momentarily For instance, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, this is a good example here. So, he says subhanahu wa ta'ala, nothing is or similar to Allah. and he is the all hearing, the all seeing. right? Look at the order of this. First, we have negation Nothing is Allah. Then, we have affirmation. He affirms for himself. Something that we are familiar with, familiar with its its basic concept and that is and he is the all hearing, all seeing. So, first, we start with negation. If it was the other way around Allah is the all hearing, all seeing, and nothing is like unto him. There's a difference now. Because for a moment, a person may imagine that Allah's sight is the sight of the human being. That Allah's hearing is the hearing of a human being. but then, that image is removed by his statement. Nothing is unto him but the image already happened in the listener's mind. It already flashed through their mind. That momentary flash of a misconception will have a bad effect on the person because once a particular idea has sparked itself in a person's mind, it's very difficult to remove that entirely. So Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala begins with negation so that the listener has no chance of misunderstanding what the verse means. So, he begins with, nothing is Allah. That's what we base everything on. All of our things that we affirm for Allah, his existence, his life, his knowledge, his hearing, his seeing, nothing is them. But then he affirms for himself and he is the all all things. So, now, we have a proper picture and that is that is hearing is something that we can't imagine. We don't know.

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His vision, we have no idea what it's like. We know what the concept of hearing is. We know what the concept of vision is but we have a principle that precedes that and that is nothing is Allah. Right? Same thing. Even even in look how it's structured. So he begins with negation and then has affirmation. Right? The scholars say a a Teskia.

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Comes before ad orning something. First, we clean and purify something before we adorn it, right? What does that mean? That means that for instance none is rightfully worshiped. So, the mind is completely emptied of all things worshiped. Then, we have affirmation. Except for Allah. So, when the the concept of the worship of Allah comes into the heart, it comes into a heart that's been purified and cleansed of all other misconceptions right This is a principle followed in the Quran and in the very carefully and that is that purification proceeds adornment, beautification. So, for instance, could you imagine if somebody is dirty? They're unclean. They haven't showered in a week. If we go and take cologne or perfume and spray this person down with this perfume what's going and then we put new brand-new clothes on this person What's going to happen to the perfume and the clothing? Obviously, it's going to become, it's going to become soiled and it's going to become diluted with with the filth that is still on the person's body. So, now, the the the perfume and the new clothing has been ruined. Right? Yeah. It's it's been deluded with filth And then after we put on perfume and after we put on fresh clothes then we go and take a shower. What happens now? You cannot completely rid yourself of the of the the the the dirt, the dirtiness that you had previously. Rather a person needs to clean himself first, then, you beautify yourself or you adorn yourself with perfume and new clothing and so forth. It's not the other way around. So, you begin with cleaning, then, you, then, you adorn and and beautify. It can't be that adorn and then try to clean around that adornment because you will you will end up with neither completely. So, this is very important that we understand that something when we say it, it has to be good in itself Number two, it has to be appropriate in the place, time, and way that it's said. Number three, it's effects need to be appropriate. That when a person says something, it has a positive effect on the listener in the proper order. If it has a negative effect on the listener, then, this is not considered to be something good right? This is now become something that is bad because it has negative effect or it's bad because it was inappropriate or it's bad because it in itself is not good. All of this begins with what? The way a person speaks. excuse me, the way a person thinks Thoughts is the beginning of all of this. and this is this is actually a question that comes up more than you would more than you would expect. Some people ask, they say, how can I, what are the steps I should take to learn to better my speech and not and not curse or not use profanity. Person has a habit of using profanity. How can they clean their their speech up? The answer is, do not with profanity. The way that you think when you are speaking to yourself, don't use anything that you wouldn't be comfortable using out loud. And this all goes back to the statement of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. In about a he says subhanahu wa ta'ala and Surat he says, Stay away from most insinuation or suspicion because some suspicion is sinful. So, when a person suspects or is suspicious of another person or thinks bad or ill of another person, this in itself is haram. If it is unfounded So, all of this begins with how a person thinks There are few problems with our modern speech. Our modern speech, especially in in our time and place here in America, we have certain ways of saying things and certain ways of speaking that are actually very negative and I'll I'll mention some of these things. Number one, the use, the excessive use of profan profane language to the point that some people can't even utter a sentence without it being laced with two or three or five. Words of profanity, right? Cursing. This is not only terrible in itself. But it is also unintelligent. Person who is profane and speaks with profanity. This articulates a person having a depraved way of thought and that this person is is unable to express himself properly without using these emphatic profanities. and so, this is this is one issue here. Now, again, it's not just what you say but it's how you say it. For instance, I'll give you a good example When I when a person speaks What are they actually doing? They're drawing a picture in the mind of the listener, right? This is what speech is. You are drawing a picture in the mind of the listener. and so, When a person outright says something profane It is you know, reverberating in the listener's mind. Likewise, when a person insinuates something that is profane, and it's kind of interesting. For example, on on television, right? They'll have subtitles for instance and a person will use profanity and so in the subtitles, they will take the first letter of the profane word and they'll make the rest, you know, an exclamation mark and a question mark and a# and right? You've just done the same exact thing. There's no difference between just saying it outright or insinuating it. The the listener heard the same thing in their mind. Am I making sense? Do you understand what I'm speaking about? So, for instance, they'll have the first letter of a profanity and then they'll bleep out the rest. It's the same thing and he had either You've just insinuated the profanity mind of the listener So, this is something that is very widespread and it's very unfortunate and it's something that we have to work on and make sure that we teach our children as well. Another thing is using vulgarity. Using vulgar words. What is vulgarity? Vulgarity is inappropriate. Words. right? the description of body parts, the description of of actions, the description. This is something that is inappropriate. A person should not allow his children for instance to use this kind of blunt language. blunt language in this fashion is not good. It is unhealthy Another Another issue that we have is using emphasis inappropriately. What does that mean using emphasis inappropriately? Pay attention to this point here Using emphasis inappropriately will end up blunting the language. So, for example, a person has something that taste good to him. Now, they start to use emphatic, hyperbolus language This was the best tasting thing I've ever had in my life. It was so wonderfully great. Now, what happens if you have something that tastes better? How are you going to describe that? Right? I am so tired. I'm dead tired. What happens when you really are dead tired? How do you describe that now? Do you understand what I mean? This blunts the language. It blunts it. It takes words of emphasis that are are used for emphasis and now it makes them just regular, mediocre and this is usually why profanity comes into speech because it starts being used to make up for the lack of emphasis found in our normal, in our normal speech, in our normal expressions of emphasis. person has, you know, kind of a slum date. This was the worst day of my life This day was terrible. It was horrendous. I was appalled about something that is my new show or something that is trivial. This blunts a person's language. Another thing that is common that blunts language is using things as a form of politeness using them or saying them too much. What makes a diamond valuable What makes a diamond valuable? Diamond for instance or platinum or these things that are considered valuable. What makes them valuable? Huh? Rarity. Rarity. Rarity makes them valuable, correct? Yeah. A diamond is is valuable because it's rare. If it, that's why pebbles or stones aren't valuable because they're everywhere. If stones were rare and diamonds were all over the place, then diamonds would not be valuable. Stones would be valuable. So, rarity and scarcity is what makes these things valuable. Likewise are things the word sorry. You notice how in common culture, how sorry is used? Every, sorry. Oh, I apologize. Oh, my bad. I'm sorry, sorry, sorry. So, now, when you really want to say sorry, it means nothing. Has no meaning. This blunts the language. It makes language ineffective A person should not use words this, sorry. you are wonderful, you're great, you're awesome. All these kind of hyperboles things that are overly emphatic. This will work towards blunting the language and making it weaker. so that when you actually say sorry for something that deserves sorry, it is, it is no longer valuable. It means nothing. This person's always saying sorry. You bump him to him, they say sorry, you know, you shoot them or they shoot you, they say sorry. Sorry is is this equal. So, this is, these are some things that are very important when it comes to speech. Another aspect of the sunnah that Ibnnu Kaim speaks about here. is the issue of using words and applying them to something that is inappropriate right? Using words, applying them to something that is inappropriate So, first, we discussed using emphasis where emphasis is not deserved. Second of all, using words where the words are not deserved. So, for instance, gives us an example here and the he he prohibited that a hypocrite or a person that is a bad person be referred to as a you know, someone who is of nobility, you would not use this language for someone who is not deserving of it. and this is something that's really widespread This happens a lot in circles of, you know, with and people that speak, you know, like imams of the Masjid or we use these big names and these big titles we give them. This is Alem. Right? Alema means a man is an ocean of knowledge. What happens when we really meet Alema? What are we going to call him? right? Likewise, if we call the hypocrites Sayed and we call the believers say it, what does say it now mean? It means nothing. It has no meaning. So, in order to maintain the sharpness of these words, we make sure that we apply them properly. We refer to a scholar, as a scholar, we refer to a Khabib as a Khabib. We refer to, you know, look at the word Sheikh. Does Sheikh mean anything anymore? And in our language here, just in general. The word Sheikh, does it mean anything? a young man could be 17, 18 years old, recites the Quran nicely. All of a sudden, he's Sheikh Chalas. So, the word Sheikh means nothing anymore. It has no meaning because we use it on everybody right? even the word scholar. It really doesn't mean anything anymore. Or half of a half of before Three, 400 years ago from the beginning of Islam till about 200 years ago. The word half of is used to refer to someone who has memorized at least 100, 000 narrations. If a person has not memorized at least 100, 000 narrations, they are not a half of. What does half of me now? Not really much. or person, you know, memorizes the Quran. that the word half of doesn't even have that much of a a meaning anymore because we've overused it. It's no longer rare But when we overuse something, it's value drops, right? Just if tomorrow, all of the people in the world brought all of the US dollars that they have, brought it all back to America, and dumped it into America. What would happen to the US dollar? US dollar would become abundant. Everyone has it and now it no longer has any value. and this is what happens when we have things inflation, right? We're just printing money, printing, money, printing, money. Now, money means nothing. So, now, we have to raise the price. Instead of a dollar, now it's 20 because a dollar has no meaning on its own anymore. These are important aspects of using speech properly. These are things that the prophet has taught us on how to speak. If we look at especially the newer generations, I honestly feel very afraid for the newer generations because the level of eloquence and intelligence in speeches plummeted. In recent years. because there is a lack of yeah, I mean, the younger generation has a very difficult time articulating themselves properly. and do you notice for instance, the use of the word I wanted to you know, like, do this thing and it's like, you know, I like, that's what the whole sentence is structured about and profanity. This articulates what? A lack of intelligence. Because the way that you speak, articulates what your mind, how your mind is structured. This is why illiteracy is very very serious thing. If a person is illiterate in this time, in this age, that articulates a lack of structure to a person's thought. The way that you structure your thoughts and the way that you organize your thoughts, this comes from reading a lot. When a person is able to read and they are able to read books, the more they read, and the level of the books that they read and the language that they read. This will translate to the way that they think and this is not just my claims. These aren't just my claims. This is this is something that has been studied recently For instance, we we usually look at presidential debates in research as kind of a measuring stick of of the level of intelligence of the general public. So, compared to the Trump era, the Obama era, those presidential debates were very sophisticated, correct? Obama era, the two thousand and eight, two thousand and 14 presidential debates, our 2012 presidential debate, we're at a sixth grade level. 6th grade, That is extremely low because anything more intelligent than that, most of the population is not going to understand what's being said. So, even though people are becoming more literate, the type of literature that they are reading is causing huge plummets and regression and human thoughts. So, we will continue this narrative next.

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