Why Parents Must Command Their Children to Pray
Teaching Children Prayer and Islamic Discipline: Parental Obligations and Responsibilities
Summary
Sh. Ali Mashhour discusses the Islamic obligation of parents to teach their children prayer beginning at age seven, based on a hadith narrated on the authority of Ali. He emphasizes that this is not merely a suggestion but a serious religious duty, explaining that children should learn to pray with full Islamic etiquette including proper covering and ablution by age seven, and that physical discipline may be employed by age ten if they fail to comply. Sh. Ali Mashhour addresses contemporary Western ideologies that discourage parental guidance, arguing that children lack the capacity for independent thought and will absorb values from their environment regardless—making parental responsibility crucial in shaping their Islamic identity and obedience to Allah.
Note: This transcript was generated using YouTube's automatic captioning, with AI-assisted cleanup for readability. It may contain inaccuracies due to background noise, audio quality, or limitations of the transcription software — particularly during Arabic recitation. Listener discretion is advised; please refer to the original video for precise wording.
Oh my shore.
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So,.
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Alhamdulillah.
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Yesterday we mentioned a narration. If you recall those of us who were with us yesterday, a narration on the authority of Ali in which he says in which the prophet sallall.aii alaihi wasallam said, "Command your children to pray at the age of seven and physically reprimand them, spank them by the age of 10 for failure to comply and separate their sleeping beds." Now this is not because prayer is obligatory upon them but because teaching them prayer is obligatory upon us. This is not a suggestion. This is an obligation. Once a child hits 7 years old, and this doesn't mean that before 7 years old, it is not prudent to urge the child to pray. Before 7 years old, many children reach what's referred to as the age of discrepancy or the age of a tame where they're able to understand dos and don'ts. And from that age, we should urge them to pray, whether that's four or five or six years old. And different children reach that age at different times. But every child by the age of seven must be obligated to pray. Must be obligated to pray by the parents. Just we have rules in the house. This is one of the rules that we pray on time. We pray all of the prayers. And this command of prayer is not just to stand up and make any old salah. You see this often, right? It is prayer and all that is included in prayer. So for instance properly covering up for salah as we'll get into see many children 9 10 11 12 years old making salah short short shorts girls making salah no hijab right by the age of seven they should be making salah as adults are making salah they should be covering up making full wudoo etc. It's not just a command to pray as a kind of game. This is serious business. By the age of 10, they should have gotten the message. If they are failing to comply now, they are to be physically spanked, physically reprimanded. Sometimes people wait until 12 and 13 and 15 to try to get their daughters into hijab, to try to get their sons to pray. It's way too late now. Now you are merely suggesting at that age. You have no control especially in this society here. And do not do not feel any kind of shame to force your children to pray and to pray on time and to obey Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala. We have this kind of thing going around where this kind of open-minded, you know, I'm open-minded if I if I I don't force my child to do that, you know. I don't want to force them. I want them to choose. It's a child. Children don't have an opinion. Children's opinions are whatever they've been taught to h hold as an opinion. They they have not grown up enough and their mind has not matured to the point where they can differentiate between their own thoughts and the thoughts of aim and the thoughts of what they heard on the television. They don't have that ability. That's why they have parents. That's why Allah gave you to them to protect them. Right? A lot of times the idea is well I don't want to I don't want to make my daughter wear hijab you know I want her to choose that on her own because this is the new this is the new suggestive you know open-minded you know ideology of western ideology that we're starting to try to adopt And the idea is well if I if I force them to pray right this is the fear. If I force them to pray if I make them wear you know my daughter wear hijab or or dress for salah or if I make my son pray or if I make him get up for fud he's going to hate me and he's going to hate Islam. That's the fear right? But Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says that the people of Allah they are not hindered in the path of Allah by the blame of larger society. You're being the the the moazine these scales are being flipped up right now as the prophet Sam said they would at the end of days that the hour will not come to be and established until the lowly are raised in society. above the higher and that is in all faction in all in all areas. Good is considered bad, bad is considered good. Trustworthiness is considered weakness, right? Deception is being clever. you know belief in Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is primitive and small-minded while belief in the universe and belief in superstitions and belief in whatever the TV show told me and this is considered to be educated and advanced and open-minded and respectable right do not be fooled by this silliness do not allow a shaitan and his to shame you out of your children. They are your children and they owe you everything. So make their repayment that of the worship of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. They are not separate from you. This is another thing that we have and it's the ultra neo individualism, right? Which is the idea is every single person has the right to be an ultra ultra super individual. I get to choose every little thing about the way my life is. That's not how it works. You didn't choose your parents. I didn't choose my parents. As a matter of fact, as a child, all choices are made for you. Either your parents will make them for you or someone else will if they fail to. So, make the choice for your parents. Also, your children are an extension of you. They're not separate entities from you. They are an extension of you. Anything that they continue to do after your death is going to all reflect back on you. If you had any say in it at all, you will either be rewarded or held accountable. So you need to make sure that you are strict with your children that they understand all things could be taken less serious except for salam, except for Islam. And this doesn't mean you don't explain things to them. Explain. Explain to them why we wear hijab. Explain to them why we make salah. Discuss with them. Articulate to them. Teach them. But also teach them the identity of the Muslim which is it's not an identity built and based on you know I'm convinced therefore I do. Many things that we do, we don't really understand. All human beings, even adults, lots of things we do, we trust others in doing them. When I turn my car on, I don't expect it to explode. I don't I expect it to work. I've never opened the hood myself. I trust the mechanic. I trust the manufacturer. I trust Right. We have to trust other people. And your children are the prime goal that everyone is after in this society. Everyone is after your children either to sell them something or to pull them into their path or their way or to convince them of something. Adults less so. The children that's really where the battle is taking place. And if you don't fill that role of telling them what they need to be before they grow into it, someone else will tell them what they need to be. If your child comes home one day and says a curse word, says a curse word, do you think in your mind, "Wow, my child discovered this all on his own. He never heard this from anyone. It just popped into his mind alone. Absolutely not. When they say a curse word, you understand that what? They heard it from someone. That's the only way they could have come up with it. All ideologies work that same way. Sometimes we see children, they, you know, in America we call them phases. you know, they go through a rebellious stage and they go through a rebellious phase and they go through, you know, , a stage of this and a stage of that. All of this is learned behavior. All of it. None of this is original thought. Children, they can't have original thought yet. This is something that they don't they don't have. It's very rare, right? which is so surprising when a child figures something out on his own or it's it's amazing because children don't usually have original thought. They say and do whatever they've been exposed to. If your child curses, it's because they've been exposed to that. If your child prays, it's because that's what they were exposed to. If your child rebelss against you, it's because that's what they were exposed to. Somewhere someone taught them that obeying the parents is not the best course of action for them. They should rebel. They learned this somewhere. So we have to make sure that we protect our children. And I'll end with this. The prophet sallall.aii Wasam said to Abu Dh in a narration in Mu Abu Da says that the prophet sallall.aii wasallam command me commanded me with nine things to hold to these nine things. And one of those things was He said, "Do not raise your stick." And this is of course a metaphorical stick and could be a physical one as well depending on the situation from upon your family and make them afraid for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala before they learn how to fear Allah teach them to be afraid of Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala most things that you do that I do we didn't think through them and we do them today. Most things that people do, that's just what they were raised to do. That's what they were exposed to and they never got around to changing it. So make sure that those are the best of things and don't let larger society shame you out of your children and.
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Oh, and tonight will be at 8. Did I already say.
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Are you saying that's why you're upset? You're just mad because you weren't over here on time.